Here Zucchini, There Zucchini, EVERYWHERE Zucchini!

I have never had a harvest of zucchini (courgettes in G.B.) as I’ve had this year!  It’s out-of-control!

This photo is just from this morning’s romp in the garden. Believe me, my garden is small … and I am no gardener. But, what to do with this latest batch??? So far, I’ve sliced, diced and stuffed zucchini.  I’ve pickled zucchini, frozen zucchini, made ratatouille, frittatas and quiches.  I’ve added zucchini to salads, stir fries and soups.  I’ve made zucchini muffins, breads, and fritters … and of course, the delicious lemon zucchini drizzle cake and chocolate zucchini bread (recipes available).  Friends, family, co-workers and neighbors don’t want them.  Yikes, what am I going to do?

I am tough … I’ll trudge on … bound and determined to use them all.  So, today I am making Mock Apple Shortbread Bars, a great, easy-to-make recipe that will have everyone scratching their heads.  Trust me!

MOCK APPLE SHORTBREAD BARS
Bake 350°.  Makes 40 or more (depending upon how big or small you cut them)

6 cups fresh zucchini, peeled, seeded and diced (about 3 large)
1/2 cup lemon juice
1 cup sugar
1 tsp. cinnamon
3-1/2 cups all purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 cup brown sugar
3 sticks butter, icy cold and cubed
1 cup chopped walnuts (optional)
1 cup oatmeal (not instant)

Use a large 16″ x 10″ sheet or jelly roll pan and line it with parchment paper or grease it well.  I like to use parchment paper so that I can lift everything out of the pan at once, let it cool and then slice.

In a large sauce pan, saute the diced zucchini with the lemon juice for about 10 minutes until soft (not mushy).  Add the sugar and cinnamon and cook for another minute or two.

While the zucchini is cooking, in a very large mixing bowl, combine the flour, salt, sugars and cinnamon.  Cut in the butter (just as if you’re making a pie dough or scones) until the flour is pea shaped and crumbly.  You can certainly do this by hand, but I like using a food processor.

From this flour mixture, take 1/2 cup and stir it into the cooked zucchini til blended with no lumps.  This will help to thicken the zucchini so that its not runny.

Add the oatmeal and chopped walnuts to the rest of the flour mixture and then take half of that and press it into the prepared sheet pan.  Really press down on it because this is going to be the crust.

Spread the cooled zucchini mixture over the crust.  Then, on top of the zucchini, spread the rest of the flour mixture and press down lightly.

Bake at 350° for 45-55 minutes.  The bars should be lightly browned, cooked on the bottom and the filling bubbly.  Cool thoroughly before slicing.  Cut them in squares, bars, diamonds.  Keep them large or small.  Trim the edges as I have here, or not.  There are no rules!

Serve these as a ‘grab and go’ bar cookie, or plated as a dessert with a scoop of ice cream. They’re great for picnics or the beach.  Crunchy and sweet, a gooey filling with a hint of cinnamon.  Your family will love them and they’ll never know they are eating their vegetables!

So if your garden is exploding with zucchini (or even if it is not), add this really easy-to-make, delicious  “mock apple bar cookie” to your ‘go to’ zucchini recipes!!  Absolutely delicious!

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Why Was the Hatter MAD?

Who doesn’t love the nonsensical story of a bored little girl, Alice in Wonderland?  This classic book, “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland”, written by Lewis Carroll (Charles L. Dodgson) in 1871, has been translated in over 100 languages, has never been out of print and from which 17 movies have been made, the first being filmed in 1903.

I’ve written about Alice before … to mark her 150th Anniversary.  Check out the link if you are interested in learning more.  This time, however, I’m more interested in the less-than-subtle character of The Mad Hatter. You have to admit Carroll’s characters are incredibly delightful and entertaining.  Each character is a vivid portrayal of the people in Charles Dodgson’s (Lewis Carroll) world.  As Charles Dickens, George Eliot, Oscar Wilde, etc. each wrote about people with whom they were familiar, interesting characters who were actually part of their lives. How could you not love the Queen of Hearts (Queen Victoria) or the Cheshire Cat?  Of course, the tea party wouldn’t be complete without the Dormouse and the March Hare.

My favorite, and apparently Tim Burton’s as well, is The Mad Hatter.  But my question is, “why was the Hatter mad?”  In the book, he was never referred to as The Mad Hatter.  He is referred to only as “The Hatter”.   It is certainly apparent, however, with his constant barrage of questions, reciting silly poetry and songs, darting in and out of seats at the never-ending tea party, that he is without a doubt, MAD as a HATTER.   Where did this catch phrase and this character come from?

After visiting a “living history” (their words, not mine) museum this past weekend, I learned that “hat manufacturers” from the 18th and 19th century were ‘mad’, with acute cases of dementia, tremors and the like.  It seems the chemicals used to cure the felt used in hat-making included mercurious nitrate.  And we all now know the dangers of being exposed to mercury.  Mercury poisoning from the prolonged exposure to the vapors of mercury causes uncontrollable muscular tremors, distorted vision and confused speech, not to mention hallucinations and other psychotic symptoms.  Dementia was a common ailment for Victorian-era hat makers.  Hence the term “mad as a hatter”.

Theophilus Carter – 1824-1904

Carroll knew one such interesting character by the name of Theophilus Carter, who, it is believed, could have been the inspiration for “the hatter”. Theo wasn’t actually a ‘hatter’ himself, but rather an upholsterer and furniture maker, and a very eccentric and flamboyant one at that.  Often seen standing at the door to his Oxford shop with his infamous top hat perched on the back of his head.  Could Theo have come in contact with mercury vapors while making and upholstering furniture?  Possibly.

How did the process for using mercury to cure felt begin?  It seems that it can be traced back to the Middle East where camel hair was used for the felt material from which fez hats are made. The demand for these hats was tremendous after Sultan Mahud made them fashionable and mandatory for his military.  It was discovered, quite by accident, that the felting process could be hurried up if the pelts were soaked with urine, camel urine to be specific.

19th Century Hat Making

The fashion for felt hats moved north into Europe and with it the manufacturing.  But, camel urine was unavailable.  It is believed that workmen in France, not having camels handy, used their own urine.  Interestingly, one workman in this particular French factory seemed to produce a consistently superior felt. This workman, it was discovered, was being treated for syphilis, with regular doses of a mercury compound.   The connection between the mercury in his urine and the improved fibers of the felt were made and thus began the widespread use of mercury nitrate in felt making.

As a result, mercury poisoning became endemic with hat makers.  Although the hatters were exposed to the mercury fumes in the making of the felt, the wearers were not.  The vapors would have dissipated long before the hat was worn. Needless to say, this process is now banned in the U.S. and Europe.  And now we know why “the hatter was MAD“.

~ ~ ~
“In that direction,” the Cat said, waving its right paw round,
“lives a Hatter: and in that direction,” waving the other paw,
“lives a March Hare. Visit either you like: they’re both mad.”

“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked.

“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat: “we’re all mad here.
I’m mad. You’re mad.”

“How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice.

“You must be, said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.”

 

The March Hare and the Hatter put the Dormouse’s head in a teapot, by Sir John Tenniel.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

References:  Wikipedia, Corrosion Doctors, Alice in Wonderland, American Chemical Society,